3 min readThe end of the year is a good time to both reflect and renew, and as you know, I look for inspiration and guidance everywhere. Last week my yoga instructor said something interesting. As we sprawled out on our mats at the end of class in a supine, sweaty Savasana, she dimmed the lights and spoke quietly:
“If you don’t ask the question, the answer will always be no.”
My mind captured that thought and planted it, and I’ve been watering it ever since.
What questions have I been withholding?
Is there something I need or want in my relationships but have remained reluctant to speak my truth? Do I need more intimacy, more space, more connection, more freedom, more commitment, more honesty, more compassion, more respect, or more understanding? If I don’t ask, it will always be no.
Is there something I need to ask of myself? A challenge I have wanted to issue, but have been afraid to utter it for fear of putting it on the table and thereby making it real? Do I need room to grow, permission to fail, or the courage to think bigger? If I don’t ask, it will always be no.
Is there something I want out of my career? Am I longing to stretch myself or take my talents in a new direction? Do I want a raise, a promotion, a transfer, or a sabbatical? If I don’t ask, it will always be no.
Is there something I want from my body? Do I want excellent health and fitness? Do I want to lose weight, or gain strength, endurance or flexibility? Do I want to attempt something new? Do I want to heal an injury? Do I long for adventure, a fresh challenge, or a new goal? Do I want to feel more comfortable or beautiful in my own skin? Do I want to feel more rested, energetic, or enthusiastic? If I don’t ask, it will always be no.
Is there something I want to learn? Do I want to hone a skill or resurrect a long-forgotten passion or talent? Am I longing for an identity shift or a new direction? Am I living in a way that really excites or inspires me? Can I incorporate more joy and energy into my regular routine? Can my “doing” and my “being” be more aligned? Can I better balance make a living and making a life? If I don’t ask, it will always be no.
Related: Elite Marathoner With a Day Job: “It’s Not Always Going to Be Perfect”
Is there a legacy I want to create? Am I spending my time in such a way that maximizes memories and minimizes regrets? Do the people I love know how much I love them? Am I brave enough to ask them how I can love them better or show up for them in a more meaningful or profound way? Can I make a deeper impact on the people and the pursuits that mean the most? Can I find ways to say “no” to the things that will make my “yes” have more precision and power? Can I shake off limitation and procrastination and make this day a new beginning? If I don’t ask, it will always be no.
Is there something I want from 2017? Am I ready to transform? Can I fully cooperate in learning the lessons that life gives? Can I find ten things to be grateful for every morning when I wake up and every evening when I go to sleep? Am I willing to let go of fear, recognizing it as my biggest limitation (remember fear is False Evidence Appearing Real)? Will I open my mind and my heart to possibilities greater than any I have ever considered before?
If we don’t ask, it will always be no.
Happy New Year, peeps. I am thankful for you and wish you all the finest blessings in 2017.
Kristin Armstrong is a mother, a writer, and a runner. She has written six books, including her latest, Mile Markers: The 26.2 Most Important Reasons Why Women Run.
